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Q: Fran Asks:
Dear Love Coach, I am in my early 40’s and so is he. We have been dating for a number of months. I like him and he seems to like me. My friends tell me that he is very much into me, but I am not feeling it. He doesn’t call much and he doesn’t seem eager to see me. Instead we seem to have settled into a routine and there seems to be not much excitement. What can I do? ~ Fran
A: Love Coach Rinatta answers:
Fran, here’s something I know for sure. When a man’s into you he will call and will be eager to see you, and so it seems that he’s not that into you. Perhaps he’s dating you because you are easy to be with, nice enough or safe. If you want to form a relationship based on those feelings, great. But if you keep moving forward with this relationship you will keep feeling the same way – as if something is missing.
Let me explain bit more. People are typically on their best behavior, their most enamored, romantic behavior at the start of the relationship. So what you are seeing from this guy right now is his best and top most enamored behavior towards you. And it’s making you feel like something is missing. This means as you go forward, you will either feel the same, or even more as if something is missing.
Some people believe that as they fall in love there will be more romance, more affection, and this is true. But, only of relationships where there is already romance and affection to start with, where there’s “into each other” feelings to start with. [read more…]
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