http://www.asklovecoach.com/question_for_your/ Expert answers to your love and relationship questions from Love and Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries. Thu, 03 Jul 2008 23:29:34 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5 http://www.asklovecoach.com/question_for_your/#comment-573 rivka Mon, 24 Mar 2008 21:23:32 +0000 http://www.asklovecoach.com/?p=22#comment-573 Responding to your question about what I would like to know "most" about how to remold the old or attract new--- I would like to know this.... Why is it that we women KNOW about, complain about and cannot live with a guy's characteristic or ideosyncratic behavior, yet after the break up, we rationalize that it wasn't that bad? OR, when we KNOW that we don't like, (for example) the ex boyfriend's laziness, and see it as a lack of ability to "take charge" of his life, we see it again in the next guy, and once again, rationalize it as "well, it's not laziness, he's just a free thinker and more spontaneous than uptight". We (ok, I) want it to be right so badly, we tend to make the same choices and mistakes over and over. I've read that book "women who love too much" and though it's seems a bit Freudian in thought, I agree with the findings that we seek what is comfortable to us, good or bad. How do we become more courageous enough to say "no...he is a great guy EXCEPT this thing that you KNOW will be a problem down the road". thanks. rivka Responding to your question about what I would like to know “most” about how to remold the old or attract new—
I would like to know this….
Why is it that we women KNOW about, complain about and cannot live with a guy’s characteristic or ideosyncratic behavior, yet after the break up, we rationalize that it wasn’t that bad? OR, when we KNOW that we don’t like, (for example) the ex boyfriend’s laziness, and see it as a lack of ability to “take charge” of his life, we see it again in the next guy, and once again, rationalize it as “well, it’s not laziness, he’s just a free thinker and more spontaneous than uptight”.
We (ok, I) want it to be right so badly, we tend to make the same choices and mistakes over and over. I’ve read that book “women who love too much” and though it’s seems a bit Freudian in thought, I agree with the findings that we seek what is comfortable to us, good or bad. How do we become more courageous enough to say “no…he is a great guy EXCEPT this thing that you KNOW will be a problem down the road”.
thanks.
rivka

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